A weekend of EPIC WINS and EPIC FAILS.

When you're at Cambridge, people speak of Fifth Week Blues - work overload, missing home, homicidal thoughts... well, Korea has its own version of that: SIXTH WEEK EPIC FAILS. But, unlike Cambridge, Korea adds a bit of spice into the mix too (I told you that red pepper paste was everywhere!), offering some SIXTH WEEK EPIC WINS too. So, behold...! The EPIC WINS and the EPIC FAILS of the past few days:

EPIC WIN: LADY GAGA IN SEOUL:

When you've got it... flaunt it on a piano made of bubbles wearing a flesh-coloured all-in-one.

omiGAWD. This clearly needs no explanation, but let me give one anyway: PURE AWESOME. However awesome you think Lady Gaga is (I'm not even going to contemplate the ridiculous notion that you might think otherwise), you'll be forced to multiply that by infinity when you see her live. I know I'm speaking hyperbole, but she's worth it. Literally. And we were SO CLOSE to the front as well! Our tickets were for much further back in the standing zone than where we ended up, but the good old Korean crowd pushers worked their magic and we were carried, shove by shove, almost right to the Lady herself! And then, the Gaga-adorned curtain lifted to reveal a parade of ridiculously (i.e. AMAZINGLY) flair costumes, disco sticks, motorbikes, onstage orgasms and even a piano made entirely of bubbles... it was a visual and aural masterpiece, in which I was probably the only person in a sea of Seoulites who knew every last word Gaga was singing (or, let's face it, the only person with little enough dignity to make the fact known by shamelessly singing along for the whole schebang! XD) Anyway, I could go on, but you get the idea. It OWNED. ...which makes my next woeful tale even more of an EPIC FAIL...

EPIC FAIL: n00bs should not use cameras.

OMGFAIL. If you know me - or, at least, know my FaceBook, you'll know that I'm a photo whore. Literally, I could be at a paint-drying convention and I'd find something to fill up three FaceBook albums worth of photos with. So, if you're sharp, you might be wondering why I have LESS THAN 10 PHOTOS of the Royal Ms Gaga? 10! Now, I don't do Maths, but 10?! That's pretty much 0! 10?!

...sadly, although it may make for a more enchanting tale, it wasn't because I was so enraptured with the Gaga that I was unable to bring myself to snap away like a madman as usual. It was much more failsome. It was well over an hour into the whole schebang (after an intoxicating performance of "Boys Boys Boys") that, to cut a short story even shorter, I STUPIDLY DELETED THE 100+ PHOTOS I'D TAKEN. ARRRRRRRRGH. The world literally stood still for a moment when the words "Memory Card Empty" flashed up on the screen in their patronising simplicity. If the guy behind me nudges me in the back one more time with his ridiculously oversized arms, I SWEAR I'LL RIP THEM OFF AND BEAT HIM TO DEATH WITH THEM! RAAAAAAWR! ...but then, Gaga was back, and a modicum of sanity was restored. Still angry, but slightly sane. Not sane enough to stop the nightmares, and the cold sweats, but enough to stop me from being arrested, at least.

EPIC WIN: PAY DAY!

Now, before I get the urge to do something illegal again, let's talk about something more exciting: PAY DAY! WOOOOOOO! A big envelope of money was handed my way and soon converted into bags of COEX goodies: new jeans to replace the old ones (see below), funky new white headphones so that I can look particularly cool on the subway (:P) and t-shirts, t-shirts, t-shirts! (My favourite being my pixellated MegaMan one! Deliciously retro). On a more practical side, it's also nice to have money again, so that I CAN LIVE. Being a Seoulite can actually be quite expensive! And, while the headphones are good (trust me, they're GOOD), living's not bad either.

EPICAL FAIL: "Next time, when the choice is between noraebang and pool, and there's drink involved, choose pool. FOR GOD SAKE CHOOSE POOL!"

...now sadly, when the 100+ Gaga photos were ruthlessly put to their untimely end, so too were a host of other photos from Saturday night. Perhaps this time, though, there's less to mourn. Yes, I got drunk, then someone thought it'd be a good idea to ask me if I wanted to go noraebang. Now, before we continue the story, let's just pause for a moral interjection. *ahem* WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT TO A DRUNK PERSON?! Quite clearly it's something which you should JUST NOT DO. Like EVER! It's just WRONG! But, as obvious as this moral outrage is in retrospect, I didn't see it coming at the time. So I said yes. I sang. I "danced". I somehow ripped a MASSIVE HOLE IN THE ARSE OF MY JEANS. In short, I completely went for it and made a complete breadbin of myself. Obviously, everybody else thought it was HILARIOUS. Woop de doo, for them! I'll bear that in mind next time they've had a little too much melon-flavoured soju!

...if there's any saving grace, I'm just happy that the memories are fuzzy - if they were any clearer, I might actually be able to hear myself murdering "Womanizer", or worse, picture it... *shudder*.

But, before I get depressed at that failboat of a night, let me take some more Gaga:

...ahhh, much better.

Oh, and remember that camping trip with Boug (aka Jafar) that I mentioned a few posts ago? ...course you don't! Well, it's going down THIS WEEKEND! Camping?! LITERALLY haven't been since I was 12! xD Aaaah - excitement! :DDDD